* Please Note: The creator of this site may not agree with the following information/writings. Please be advised that this material may be very triggering and/or graphic in nature
• Giving in to food shows weakness, be strong, and you'll be better than everyone else
• Do not give up what you most want for what you want at the moment
• An imperfect body reflects an imperfect soul
• Craving is only a feeling
I wanna be laughed at, Laughed with, just because.
I wanna feel weightless, And that should be enough.
I wanna be laughed at, Laughed with, just because.
I wanna feel weightless, And that should be enough.
• An ordinary girl, an ordinary waist, but ordinary is just not good enough today
• If it was easy, everybody will be thin
• If it tastes good, it's trying to kill you
• Calories CAN NOT make you happy
• Sacrifice is giving up something good for something better
• The beginning is always today
• It doesn't matter how slow you go, as long as you don't stop
• It's the mind that makes the body
• Every time you say no to food, you say yes to thin
• Eat to live, don't live to eat
• When you resist the pain of hunger, it means your not a slave of your body
• Don't eat! Do you want to stay fat?
• Being thin is more important than everything!
• You want food? Look at those thighs!
• Bones define who we really are! Let them show!
• Do you really want to be that weight for the rest of your life?
• Eat less, weigh less
• Thin is beautiful, even thinner is perfection
• I only feel beautiful when I'm hungry
• Skip dinner, end up thinner
• Respect yourself, put down the fork
• Nothing tastes as good as thin feels
• Thin is perfection, I'll die trying to achieve it
• Your mind should always be on your diet!
• You can never be too rich or too thin.
• Not eating light makes your clothes too tight!
• Hunger pangs are fat leaving your body!
• If you dream it you can do it!
• This is forever. I will do whatever it takes. I want to be thin more than anything, even food!
• I'm not there yet, but I'm closer than yesterday!
• An Imperfect body reflects an Imperfect person!
• Food is temptation, once you over come temptation, you can do anything!
• You can't taste perfection, you can feel it!
• I don't care if it hurts, I want to have control, I want a perfect body, I want a perfect soul
• This is forever. I will do whatever it takes. I want to be thin more than anything, even food...
• Starvation is fulfilling. Colors become brighter, sounds sharper, odors so much more savory and penetrating that inhalation fills every fiber and pore of the body. The greatest enjoyment of food is actually found when never a morsel passes the lips.
• THIS IS NOT A DIET. IT IS A LIFESTYLE.
• One day I will be thin enough. Just the bones, no disfiguring flesh. Just the pure clear shape of me, bones. That is what we all are, what we're made up of and everything else is just storage, deposit, waste. Strip it away, use it up.
• You will be tempted quite frequently, and you will have to choose whether you shall enjoy the twenty minutes or so that you will be consuming excess calories, or whether you will cordially despise yourself for two or three days, for your lack of willpower.
• Nothing. Nothing is wrong, and asking is against the rules. Crying is against the rules. You're strong, don't let them break you. They're trying to destroy you.
• Quod me nutrit, me destruit. (What nourishes me also destroys me.)
• The more [shit] they give me; the less [food] I'll eat.
• Most women live their lives in a state of starvation. Why should I be any different?
• It's simple: You decide once and for all that you aren't going to eat, and then there is no further decision to make.
• In the body, as in sculpture, perfection is attained not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.
• They always say they're concerned about me, about my health, when all they want to do is control me. They want to pin me down and force-feed me with lies, with what they call love. Like prisoners everywhere, all I have left is the power to refuse.
• I do eat normally: only what is needful for survival. I can't help it that we live in a piggish society where gluttony is the norm, and everyone else is constantly stuffing themselves.
• When I wake, I'm empty, light, light-headed. I like to stay this way, free and pure, light on my feet, traveling light. For me, food's only interest lies in how little I need, how strong I am, how well I can resist, each time achieving another small victory of the will.
• Like a plant, surely the body can be trained to exist on nothing, to take its nourishment from the air.
• When you coast without eating for a significant period of time, and you are still alive, you begin to scoff at those fools who believe they must eat to live. It is blatantly obvious to you that this is not true.
• Food hinders your progress.
• We turn skeletons into goddesses, and look to them as if they might teach us how not to need.
• How many pounds till I am happy, how many pounds till I get thin? Three more pounds till I am skinny, three more pounds and I win!
• You've made a decision: you will NOT stop. The pain is necessary, especially the pain of hunger. It reassures you that you are strong, can withstand anything.
• You can learn to love anything, I think, if you need to badly enough. I trained myself to enjoy feeling hungry. If my stomach contracts, or I wake up feeling nauseated, or I'm light-headed or have a hunger headache, or better yet, all of the above, it means I'm getting thinner, so it feels good. I feel strong, on top of myself, in control.
• Calories can't make you happy.
• Do you like it enough to wear it?
• You can never be too rich or too thin.
• Love not what you are, but what you may become.
• Don't let todays moment forsake tomorrows dream.
• I don't begin. I have no problem
• Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.
• People don't see me. No one sees me. It's like being fat. No one takes you seriously. You just don't exist you're so big, you're not even there *Don't do anything today that you'll regret tomorrow
• Pain is weakness leaving the body
• The difference between want and need is self control.
• A full belly is the mother of all evil.
• If you have weight to lose, lose it. It wouldn't be there if you weren't supposed to lose it.
• Every time I have the opportunity to eat, I have the strength to refuse.
• Know that the pain will pass... when it passes... you will be stronger, happier, and more aware.
• Everything I want to be, I am, only buried under a layer of fat.
• My scale is never happy, neither am I.
• Bones define who we really are, let them show.
• Time spent wasting is not wasting time.
• This isn't so bad, I can go another day.
• If you don't run your own life, someone else will.
• Good girls don't swallow.
• Failure is taking the path that everyone else does, success is making your own path.
• Success is determined by how determined you are to succeed.
• Can't they realize my strength? How much it's taken me to make so little of myself.
• Life's problems wouldn't be called "hurdles" if there wasn't a way to get over them.
• God gives us dreams a size too big so that we can grow in them.
• Between the great things we cannot do and the small things we will not do, the danger is that we shall do nothing.
• The question isn't who is going to let me; it's who is going to stop me.
• Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michaelangelo, Mother Teresea, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.
• Life is full of obstacle illusions.
• It is never too late to be who you might have been.
40 Reasons To Be thin
1. too many people in the world are obese
2. only thin people are graceful
3. the only time people do notice a fat person is when thay get in the way of that beautuful thin girl walking by
4. guys will want to know you, not laugh at you and walk away
5. fat people can't fit everywhere
6. the models that everyone claims are beautiful, the splitting image of perfection, are any of them fat? indeed not
7. ballerina? or beanbag?
8. nothing tastes as good as thin feels
9. thin people look good in any type of clothing
10. eating is conforming to everyone else's expectations
11. have you ever seen a person not notice a walking skeleton
12. nothing can't be fixed with hunger and weightloss
13. underweight aka perfect body
14. you'll be able to move as quietly and skillfully as a spider
15. people will remember you as "the beautiful thin one"
16. you'll be able to run faster without all that extra weight holding you back
17. you will be fat if you eat today, just put it off one more day
18. anyone can have "inner beauty" but few can achieve real beauty, inside as well as out
19. i want to walk in the snow and leave no footprints
20. guys will be able to pick you up without struggling
21. hunger is your friend and it won't betray you like food
22. i want to be light enough so a helium baloon could lift me and carry me to the clouds
23. only fat people are attracted to fat people. do you want pigs to like you because you are one of them
24. bones are clean and pure. fat is dirty and hangs on your bones like a parasite
25. you will be able to see your beautiful, beautiful bones
26. think as anorexia as your secret weapon
27, is food more important than happiness in life? i think not!
28. when you start to get dizzy and weak you're almost there
29. you don't need food
30. people who eat are selfish and unrealistic
31. saying "no thanks" to food is saying "yes please" to thin!
32. starving is an example of excellent willpower
33. if you eat then you'll look like those disgusting, fat, ghetto and trailer-trash hookers on jerry springer
34. if someone has to describe you, they'll say "oh she weighs like 100, 110 lbs"
35. fat people are so huge, yet people look away from them as if they don't exist
36. food is mean and sneaky. it tricks you into eating it and it works on you from the inside out making you fat, bloated, ugly and unhappy
37. if you slap a fat person you can see a shockwave ripple over their skin. that's disgusting
38. starve off the parts you don't need. they're ugly and they drag you down
39. do you want people to say "for gods sake get off me you're crushing me!"
40. if you can name one reason to be fat, i'll name a million and one to be thin
I chose to include this part of the page because we all peruse pro-ana sites, that's why most of you read, I know that's why I do. I've read about the Pro-Ana religion more times than I could count, and I am trying to compile a whole lot of information into these blog pages. There will be changes pretty frequently.
Ana Laws
-Thin is beauty; therefore I must be thin, and remain thin, If I wish to be loved. Food is my ultimate enemy. I may look, and I may smell, but I may not touch!
-I must think about food every second of every minute of every hour of every day... and ways to avoid eating it.
-I must weigh myself, first thing, every morning, and keep that number in mind throughout the remainder of that day. Should that number be greater than it was the day before, I must fast that entire day.
-I shall not be tempted by the enemy (food), and I shall not give into temptation should it arise. -Should I be in such a weakened state and I should cave, I will feel guilty and punish myself accordingly, for I have failed her.
-I will be thin, at all costs. It is the most important thing; nothing else matters.
-I will devote myself to Ana. She will be with me where ever I go, keeping me in line. No one else matters; she is the only one who cares about me and who understands me. I will honor Her and make Her proud.
Ana Psalm
Strict is my diet
I must not want
It maketh me lie down at night hungry
It leadeth me past the confectioners
It trieth my will power
It leadeth me in the paths of alternation for my figure sake
Yeah, though I walk trough the aisles of the pastry department, I will buy no sweet rolls for they are fattening
The cakes and the pies, they tempt me
Before me is a table set with green beans and lettuce
I filleth my stomach with liquids
My day's quota runneth over
Surely calorie and weight charts will follow me, all days of my life
And I will dwell in the fear of the scales forever
Ana's creed
-I believe in control, the only force mighty enough to bring order to the chaos that is my world.
-I believe that I am the most vile, worthless an useless person ever have to existed on this planet, and that I am totally unworthy of anyone's time and attention.
-I believe in ought’s, musts and should’s, as unbreakable laws to determine my daily behavior.
-I believe in perfection and strive to attain it.
-I believe in salvation trough starvation.
-I believe in calorie counters as the inspired word of god, and memorize them accordingly.
-I believe in bathroom scales as an indicator of my daily successes and failures.
-I believe in hell, cause sometimes I think I live in it.
-I believe in a wholly black an white world, the losing of weight, recrimination for sins, the elongation of the body and a life ever fasting.
Letter from Ana
Allow me to introduce myself. My name, or as I am called by so called "doctors", is Anorexia. Anorexia Nervosa is my full name, but you may call me Ana. Hopefully we can become great partners. In the coming time, I will invest a lot of time in you, and I expect the same from you.
In the past you have heard all of your teachers and parents talk about you. You are "so mature", "intelligent", "14 going on 45", and you possess "so much potential". Where has that gotten you, may I ask? Absolutely no where! You are not perfect, you do not try hard enough, further more you waste your time on thinking and talking with friends and drawing! Such acts of indulgence shall not be allowed in the future.
Your friends do not understand you. They are not truthful. In the past, when the insecurity has quietly gnawed away at your mind, and you asked them, "Do I look....fat?" and they answered "Oh no, of course not" you knew they were lying! Only I tell the truth. Your parents, let's not even go there! You know that they love you, and care for you, but part of that is just that they are your parents and are obligated to do so. I shall tell you a secret now: deep down inside themselves, they are disappointed with you. Their daughter, the one with so much potential, has turned into a fat, lazy, and undeserving girl.
But I am about to change all that.
I expect a lot from you. You are not allowed to eat much. It will start slowly:
decreasing of fat intake, reading the nutrition labels, cutting out junk food, fried food, etc. For a while, the exercise will be simple: some running, perhaps some crunches and some sit ups. Nothing too serious. Perhaps drop a few pounds, take a little off of that fat tub of a stomach. But it won't be long before I tell you that it isn't good enough.
I will expect you to drop your calorie intake and up your exercise. I will push you to the limit. You must take it because you cannot defy me! I am beginning to embed myself into you. Pretty soon, I am with you always. I am there when you wake up in the morning and run to the scale. The numbers become both friend and enemy, and the frenzied thoughts pray for them to be lower than yesterday, last night, etc. You look into the mirror with dismay. You prod and poke at the fat that is there, and smile when you come across bone. I am there when you figure out the plan for the day: 400 calories, 2 hours exercise. I am the one figuring this out, because by now my thoughts and your thoughts are blurred together as one.
I follow you throughout the day. In school, when your mind wanders I give you something to think about. Recount the calories for the day. It's too much. I fill your mind with thoughts of food, weight, calories, and things that are safe to think about. Because now, I am already inside of you. I am in your head, your heart, and your soul. The hunger pains you pretend not to feel is me, inside of you.
Pretty soon I am telling you not only what to do with food, but what to do ALL of the time. Smile and nod. Present yourself well. Suck in that fat stomach, dammit! God, you are such a fat cow!!!! When mealtimes come around I tell you what to do. I make a plate of lettuce seem like a feast fit for a king. Push the food around. Make it look like you've eaten something. No piece of anything...if you eat, all the control will be broken...do you WANT that?? To revert back to the fat COW you once were?? I force you to stare at magazine models. Those perfect skinned, white teethed, waifish models of perfection staring out at you from those glossy pages. I make you realize that you could never be them. You will always be fat and never will you be as beautiful as they are. When you look in the mirror, I will distort the image. I will show you obesity and hideousness. I will show you a sumo wrestler where in reality there is a starving child. But you must not know this, because if you knew the truth, you might start to eat again and our relationship would come crashing down.
Sometimes you will rebel. Hopefully not often though. You will recognize the small rebellious fiber left in your body and will venture down to the dark kitchen. The cupboard door will slowly open, creaking softly. Your eyes will move over the food that I have kept at a safe distance from you. You will find your hands reaching out, lethargically, like a nightmare, through the darkness to the box of crackers. You shove them in, mechanically, not really tasting but simply relishing in the fact that you are going against me. You reach for another box, then another, then another. Your stomach will become bloated and grotesque, but you will not stop yet. And all the time I am screaming at you to stop, you fat cow, you really have no self control, you are going to get fat.
When it is over you will cling to me again, ask me for advice because you really do not want to get fat. You broke a cardinal rule and ate, and now you want me back. I'll force you into the bathroom, onto your knees, staring into the void of the toilet bowl. Your fingers will be inserted into your throat, and, not without a great deal of pain, your food binge will come up. Over and over this is to be repeated, until you spit up blood and water and you know it is all gone. When you stand up, you will feel dizzy. Don't pass out. Stand up right now. You fat cow you deserve to be in pain!
Maybe the choice of getting rid of the guilt is different. Maybe I chose to make you take laxatives, where you sit on the toilet until the wee hours of the morning, feeling your insides cringe. Or perhaps I just make you hurt yourself, bang your head into the wall until you receive a throbbing headache. Cutting is also effective. I want you to see your blood, to see it fall down your arm, and in that split second you will realize you deserve whatever pain I give you. You are depressed, obsessed, in pain, hurting, reaching out but no one will listen? Who cares?!?!! You are deserving; you brought this upon yourself.
Oh, is this harsh? Do you not want this to happen to you? Am I unfair? I do do things that will help you. I make it possible for you to stop thinking of emotions that cause you stress. Thoughts of anger, sadness, desperation, and loneliness can cease because I take them away and fill your head with the methodical calorie counting. I take away your struggle to fit in with kids your age, the struggle of trying to please everyone as well. Because now, I am your only friend, and I am the only one you need to please.
I have a weak spot. But we must not tell anyone. If you decide to fight back, to reach out to someone and tell them about how I make you live, all hell will break lose. No one must find out, no one can crack this shell that I have covered you with. I have created you, this thin, perfect, achieving child. You are mine and mine alone. Without me, you are nothing. So do not fight back. When others comment, ignore them. Take it into stride, forget about them, forget about everyone that tries to take me away. I am your greatest asset, and I intend to keep it that way. Sincerely, Ana
Letter to Ana
Dear Ana,
I offer you my soul, my heart and my bodily functions. I give you all my earthly possessions.
I seek your wisdom, your faith and your feather weight. I pledge to obtain the ability to float, to lower my weight to the single digits, I pledge to stare into space, to fear food, and to see obese images in the mirror. I will worship you and pledge to be a faithful servant until death does us part.
If I cheat on you and procreate with Ronald McDonald, Dave Thomas, the colonel or that cute little dog. I will kneel over my toilet and thrust my fingers deep in my throat and pray for your forgiveness.
Please Ana, don't give up on me. I'm so weak, I know, but only you with your strength inside me will I become a woman worthy of love and respect. I'm begging for you not to give up, I'm pleading with my shallow breathes and my pale skin. I bleed for you, suffer leg pains, headaches and fainting spells. My love for you makes me dizzy and confused I don't know whether I'm coming or going. Men run when they see the love I have for you and never return. But they aren't important to me all that's important is that you love me.
If you stay with me, I will worship you daily, I will run miles a day, come rain, snow, bitter cold or searing heat I will run from the pain and in fright. I will do 1,000 sit ups a day and lie to my family about what I eat and how I feel. I will stop weeping when I feel your warm arms embrace my shivering body. I will numb the hunger pains with razor blades and your strength.
Today, I renew our friendship and resolve to be faithful to you year long, life long. I begin each year with a 3 day fast in honor of you. If you give me the strength to fade away I will love you and worship you forever.
When I'm finally faded to nothing, when you've given me the gift of ending this torturous life. I will float on to the next world and be thin and beautiful payment for my undying love for you in this world.
I ask only one more thing you, please Ana, remove me from this hell, from this world ASAP. Please take away this hatred for my pain and allow me to be free and light.
Love Always, Worthless One
Letter from Mia
Dear Partner,
How are you? I thought I'd take a few minutes to introduce myself. I'm known by some as Bulimia Nervosa, but seeing how we'll become so close, you can just call me Mia. That's what my best friends call me. My loyal friends. Over time, you will become my loyal friend too. Sometimes you might feel more of a servant, but then you will think of all I do for you and remember that I am your only true friend. You know how everyone around you, all those girls, seem like they have it so easy, I hate that! And I hate for you to feel less, which is why from now on, I will provide you with encouragement, and inspiration to achieve what you thought you never could. Prove all the nasty comments wrong. Also, I cannot spend my life with someone not worthy...so you will have to prove yourself to me. I'll try to hang out with you as much as possible, but nobody will know. Only you will know when I'm around. You will know when you eat something, you will know when you see that chocolate cake on the counter, because I will in the back of your mind telling you things. Sometimes I will tell you not to eat it, and you will listen. Other times, you will disobey me and devour the entire cake. Then I will really make you feel guilty.
You should have followed my orders! Now go and throw that cake up you FAT COW! How could you do that to yourself? You will take my comments to heart, and go into the bathroom, turn on the faucet, and force yourself to vomit. You will spend hours vomiting at times. Your face will be red, snot will pour, your eyes will be bloodshot, you jaw will hurt of swollen glands...serves you right! If you want to be my friend and get the full effect of what I can give you, you must follow my orders. You will soon learn that I am in control. Even when you don't do as I say, you can still hear me, screaming at you, telling you to work harder, telling you to take diet pills, telling you how fat you are, telling you what those people across the room are really whispering about. I am sure after a while of this, you will grow to hate me, but you will love me even more. You will love me so much you won't tell anyone about me. If you do, I risk being destroyed, and you don't want that do you? You will have invested so much of your time in me, that you will no longer have anyone else. You have no choice, me or complete solitude. If I'm gone, fat and cellulite will take my place. Which would you rather have? So you must not tell anyone about me. Even if you did, some people would likely not believe you and worse, think you are out for the attention. So hold your head high and look confident. With my help, you can look just as great as your favorite models and actresses. You can look better. I have to go now, but think of me often. Think of me all the time! I am the only one who TRULY wants you to feel loved. Remember that.
Sincerely,
Mia
More Pro-Ana Rules...
More Pro-Ana Rules...
1) If you aren't thin, you aren't attractive
2) Being thin is more important than being healthy
3) You must buy clothes, cut your hair, take laxatives, anything to make yourself look thinner
4) Thou shall not eat without feeling guilty
5) Thou shall not eat fattening food without punishing afterwards
6) Thou shall count calories and restrict intake accordingly
7) What the scale says is the most important thing
8) Losing weight is good, gaining weight is bad
9) You can never be to thin
10) Being thin and not eating are signs of true will power and success.
