Nov 5, 2015

Free Fallin'


This is happening so fast.

Once I tip into the 130s the game changes.
Into the 120s - Danger zone.

I'm totally out of it and I think I may be coming down with something, I forgot what happens to my immune system when I really restrict. Oh well, dumping on the vitamins for now.

I'm starting to worry about a doctors appointment I have coming up Dec 2nd. I can not have my weight be even what it is now, much less whatever it is a month from now. But faking 20 pounds for a weigh-in? That's crazy talk. Or technically I could avoid it all together, they don't know about my ED history. Maybe I could just refuse to weigh.

Either way, just about to my goal for the start of triathlon season next year. This was supposed to be reached in March. At this rate I won't be able to race.

Tomorrow marks 3 months since my relapse. I wonder what the 3 month total will be?

Depends on how today goes I guess.


Nov 2, 2015

Keep Calm!

Girl, I miss you!

I still have the same old email, (also on the sidebar), I lost most of my old emails though so I don't have yours anymore... :( Please please please shoot me a message!

Halloween weekend was quite the mess for me, everyone was drinking and eating and I got drunk and slipped. This is why I don't drink anymore. I can't trust myself. But the scale only crept up about half a pound so I'm assuming once the salt bloat goes away that it'll be back to where I was. Plus I have a new goal in sight.

140.0 (By holiday), but maybe, just maybe, it could be by thanksgiving? I had my appointment with the psych for med management on the 23rd, so I need to make some progress before then. I'm for decreasing some anxiety but not for losing my edge. I've already made a list of anti-anxiety meds associated with weight gain and loss.

Just have to be smarter than my body in the time being.

140.0 140.0 140.0