Jun 20, 2010

Very long update....

I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while. Here's what's happened.

Someone at the frat asked for my Drivers license. Twenty-five minutes later. All my stuff was moved out, like I was never even there... Just a figment of all their imaginations.....

I now live with Darcy. Celebrate with me! I live with someone completely supportive of the way I eat! I went to the store completely ready to binge like there was no tomorrow. And she looks at me and says "Now... Do you REALLY want to deal with the consequences of eating that?" Like it was the worst thing on the face of the earth. And it was. At that moment it was bad. Thank god for Darcy. I've also found the best binge food ever... Non-fat graham cracker crust. Non-fat, sugar free cheesecake flavored pudding, 2 cups of non-fat milk. It's around a 500 calorie binge if you eat the whole thing. I have one made and waiting in my refrigerator for a weak time, so I won't have an excuse to run to the store on top of everything else.

Before all this happenings, I started a post though. Finally down to 150, I feel good!! And I'm also looking at getting a second job. So I'll be busy all the time!!! Which means less time to eat. And then I'll be adding my class schedule to it in a month. Which will keep me ridiculously busy and then, when fall term comes around and I'm living with Eli, who will actually monitor the way that I eat. I'll be in class from 8am-3pm (Taking a Ballet class too) I'll also be doing gymnastics with Darcy and hopefully working a second job. So by the time I get home, I'll be so ready to just do homework and sleep that I won't even have time to eat with him, except maybe on weekends or so. My life keeps looking up. Ana must be so proud."

Tying into this. Living with Darcy is good. I'm hoping she'll let me thinspire the room, however if she does I can't let Phillip come over. And considering he lives in the same apartment complex, that's a little difficult. Although, I'm pretty sure that I can do little things around the apartment that will be thinspiring to both of us. And that only we will really notice. Phillip definitely approached me last night about my habits though. And then spoke with me this morning. He had a type of conviction that made me feel like a horrible person. But I'm not willing to change. This all stemmed from a stupid shopping trip to the supermarket where I almost had a panic attack at all the food. =/ But I convinced him, that I always eat weird. And have since I was seven. Which really isn't far from the truth, I'd eat like a pig for one week and then like a bird, all the next.

In addition to all thinspiring things, I have added a rubber band to my wrist for some classic conditioning. You can look up more about it on Google, but basically when I want to binge I'm going to pop myself with the rubber band until it doesn't seem like a good idea anymore. Going to get a red rubber band as soon as I can, to represent Ana and ED.

Well, I think that's everything new... Sorry for the long post, thanks for sticking with me if you managed to for all this time...!

Here's a few thinspiring quotes to get your week going...

"Don't eat like a pig and run like a racehorse, eat like a bird. Eventually, you'll learn to fly."

"Nothing taste's as good as thin feels."

"Bones, beautiful bones. They're magical, like fairies."

"Better to be noticed for taking up so little space, than ignored for taking up too much."

"It's ten percent luck, twenty percent skill, fifteen percent concentrated power of will, five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain. One hundred percent reason to remember the name."

Stay strong, think thin, live ana, live ana for all the people that can't and want to.

Live Ana with me.

xxxblakexxx

5 comments:

  1. I live in my own place, so it's easier than people who live with my parents, but it would be pretty good living with someone else who supported it too :)super good that the housing situation ended up working out <3

    (also, if you log out and log back in again off this blog, it comes up with an option to "return to Ana's arms" and I thought that made a scary amount of sense)

    ReplyDelete
  2. That does make a scary amount of sense!!! Keep coming back! I'll try not to disappoint!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Congratulations on the weight loss girrl! Sorry you had to move out, but at least you're in with someone who's supportive :)
    Thanks or the motivational quotes - I needed them!
    xxx

    ReplyDelete
  4. Haha, I'll keep reading no worries, as long as you don't mind my random comments >.<

    ReplyDelete
  5. Random Comments are very appreciated!! And spread the word about the blog! Followers are motivating too! =P

    ReplyDelete